Hard Day. 

Today was a hard day. 
This week has been a hard week. 

With Nathan being sick, Caleb and I haven’t gotten much sleep. 

Nathan is doing much better, then baby girl decides I’m going to be nauseous again at night, which I’m not loving. After dealing with not sleeping from my sick son, then not sleeping from pregnancy symptoms, and another pregnancy symptom hits me hard. More like punches me hard. 

Nightmares. 

I know it’s a pregnancy symptom, but I would really love to not wake up one night shaking because I witnessed someone I love being killed. And these dreams are vivid and detailed. Dayssss later I still am remembering these horrible details. So I don’t sleep much. 

Not sleeping causes me to not be my best. 

When I’m overly tired and not my best, I’m not patient with my son, as loving to my husband, and things get to me so easily. 

A post on Instagram made me go crazy for a couple hours. I was contemplating deleting the person because I couldn’t move forward from it. 

I think as women we really need to be aware of what’s going on with our bodies before we react to something. We have so many different hormones, or level of exhaustion that can really affect how we handle a situation. 

It can be so difficult in the moment to stop and ask, is this actually something to be upset about or am I extra emotional today? 

Our words and how we respond have such an impact on people that it’s so important to take a breath and think before speaking or acting. 

It reminds me of the plants that grow extra big and pretty when positive words and singing are praised it’s way. That’s a plant. A plant grows with positivity. Imagine how a human would grow if their was less negativity coming down on them!

It’s also very common for me to be attacked by the devil when I’m extra tired or emotional. When I let my guard down or don’t read my bible that day, the devil just shows up with lies and negativity. Because I haven’t put on the armor of God for the day, I’m moved to believe those lies being shot at me. 

My overall message that I’m trying to convey is, it’s important to 1. Put on the armor of God every day and 2. Be aware of our bodies and what is happening in them to know why we are responding the way we are. 

xoxo kymberly 

ūüíó

I wrote this April 18th, and never published it. So today wasn’t the hard day, but I still felt like I should publish it today. 

Turning Two. 

Well the time has come to where I will start saying, “I have a two year old”! How exciting, nerve racking, and holy moly where did those two years go?

Two is an age you hear about so often. I just got used to talking about my “toddler”, and now I get to add the word “two”. 

Two just gives this whole new understanding into a parents world I feel. I know I’ll learn more this up coming year, but hearing about “terrible twos” and the vocabulary, attitude, sass, understanding, growing, and changing that happens during the second year of life makes me so excited and so sad. 

I am so blessed to have such a healthy and smart little boy! I never want to take that for granted. So when I have sad moments, some times I feel guilty. “Why am I sad right now when my son is growing perfectly and I get to experience this life with him?” 

I started decorating for Nathan’s birthday party today. I hung up his banner, 


And when I sat down, I just couldn’t stop staring at, “2nd” 

I just sat on my couch and couldn’t stop looking at the number 2 hanging on the banner. 

Where has time gone? Will the rest of the years fly this fast?

This is his last birthday as a single child, the house is going to be Mickeys Club House for about a week (maybe longer). I want to hold tight to this birthday with my baby boy. Really soak in this 2nd birthday party before life get even more busy and my time is shared with baby sister! 

I love you buddy! I hope you love the party we are throwing for you! 
xoxo kymberly 

Less Anxiety, More Peace

I have a good amount of strengths and weaknesses in my character. I’m proud of my strengths and try to use them to the best I can. But then I have some weaknesses that I really struggle with. 
One of my biggest weaknesses is Anxiety. Especially when it comes to health. 

I’ve shared before this weakness of mine. It started as a young child, grew when Caleb had a brain tumor and grew some more when I became a mom. 

I really learned of this weakness as a mom. Before this stage of motherhood in my life I was focused on my weaknesses at my job or in relationships. Once that second line turned pink on the pregnancy test, my anxiety of the unknown of health shot to the moon. 

I’ve really tried to work on this. My bathroom mirror is covered in verses on this subject. My bible study friends have prayed over me to have more faith and less fear. I really don’t want this anxiety of something I cannot, or ever will, be able to control! 

  
Nathan was diagnosed with croup this past weekend and I am really thankful at how God has answered prayer and placed such a peace in my heart. The night before we took Nathan to the doctor, we stayed up all night watching him, holding him, listening to him. 

It was so scary and so horrible. This breathing that sounded like he couldn’t actually get any air. 

I prayed all night. For healing, for rest, for time to pass by quickly. But I didn’t text all my friends like I have in the past to pray for him. I would get scared, but I didn’t have any anxiety. I stayed pretty calm and just continued to pray. 

I am still putting anxiety in my weakness bucket. I still want to work on it and grow, but I’m really excited of how far I’ve come! I give all the glory to God! I didn’t freak out, I didn’t wake up all my friends to pray for him, I just kept praying myself! 

I’m sharing this because I want to encourage anyone that is working on a weakness in their life. No matter what your life looks like, we all have weaknesses we can work on. 

It was a really big deal to me once I realized that I didn’t have an anxiety attack about his health. I didn’t feel like we needed to go to the ER. I didn’t research a bunch of sicknesses on Google. I had taken a step forward on this journey of turning this weakness into a strength. I want the strength of peace and calmness in a storm of the unknown. 

If you are really working on a weakness, don’t give up! It’s really hard to change a habit or characteristic in your life, but you can do it! Keep it up and one day, you’ll realize you took a big step forward and it’s so rewarding!!! 

Have a blessed day!

  
xoxo kymberly 

ūüíó

Photos found and taken from Pintrest 

Prayer Challenge. 

  
Have you ever just been going on with your week or day as normal and then it’s like you randomly walk into a brick wall of a revalation? 

That’s what happened to me last week. 

I was just doing my thing, my routine of a day and week and was just hit with the word “pray”. But it wasn’t like, “Kymberly, you should pray right now”. It was this deep burning fire that was all of a sudden, out of no where, a passion to learn how to pray. 

For about three years now I have had a prayer buddy. She’s amazing. We have been friends for a good amount of years and I can’t remember how we even stated that we were becoming prayer buddies, but we did. 

I think it’s so important to have a prayer buddy in life. Life happens and we talk every day or once every two weeks, on prayer request. I share my heart with her on pretty deep level. Sharing the messy things in my life and know it’s not leaving her. She’s a vault. 

So as I have this urge last week to really dive into praying and what I means to pray and how I want to pray, I shared it with my prayer buddy. 

So I am on a prayer challenge. That is what I’m calling this season of my life. I have my Bible, and some books to help me start. I have read three of the prayer books in the picture below, and am reading the second two right now. Ill do a little book review on them all when I’m done, but would love information on other resources!! Blow up my email or comments with suggestions on books, podcast, or anything that has helped you learn to pray bolder and deeper!!! 

 

I am very fired up about this season. I decided to give up my much needed naps this month and do an extra quiet time every day to dig deeper and learn more. 

My overall goal is to really learn how to pray and what it looks like to pray bold and big prayers. Prayers that move the heart of God and show my faith in what I believe he can do. 

I have already learned so much. Just the simple verse that I started this post off with, Luke 11:1, “Lord teach me how to pray”! There are so many verses on prayer in the bible that I have never studied before! 

This week of reading I have been so inspired with so many words and thoughts. I can go weeks with no words or anything to post on here, but this week I am posting almost every day! It’s incredible the inspiration I have found this week! 

I am also in constant contact with my prayer buddy. I know a season of being super fired up for what God has to teach me puts a target on my back for the devil. The devil doesn’t want me to learn what God has in mind for me. So my prayer buddy has me covered in prayer from any attacks or distractions in this season! 

xoxo kymberly 

Top picture I created on the Bible app

 

Croup, Ear Infections, and Mom Guilt 

As a mom do you ever feel like your being judged? Have mom guilt settle in? Rarely do I get these feelings, but today I did. 
Nathan had the flu a couple weekends ago. He finally fully recovered and then got a fever. The next day the fever turned into a small little cough and he lost his voice. That night his breathing scared me so much I didn’t sleep. 

I finally woke Caleb up and told that I was scared and we both stayed up and took turns holding him and trying to sleep. I don’t think either of us actually slept. 

Once he woke up in the morning we went to urgent care and found out he had croup and an ear infection. 

So I know I didn’t sleep and was extra tired during this Doctor Appointment, but every time she asked, “is he in day care?” “Does he play with other kids?” I felt like because the answers were no he shouldn’t have gotten sick. 

I left feeling that #momguilt again. 

“I should have taken him to the doctor yesterday”

“I should pay more attention to what he touches at the store”

“I should have more play dates so he builds up his immune system”

“He shouldn’t be sick when I’m with him all the time”

But all of those are just ridiculous lies that we’re going threw my mind. In that moment of walking to the car I fell into this black hole of being judge by the doctor and everyone that asked me, “where could he get croup from?”

My best friend made me laugh when she said, “he could have touched a cereal box that another kid sneezed on.” Which is so true. 

Why am I feeling judged or mom guilt when so much is completely out of my hands? Nathan is two weeks shy of being two years old, I can’t prevent him from everything he touches, nor do I want to prevent him from exploring and using all his senses as we go out and about our day. 

If you are feeling judged or some mom guilt, remember how awesome you are! Being a mom is such hard work! It’s the job you never have a break in. You’re up all night watching them breath, listening to a difference in their cough, and got to be on your A game when they wake up. In that exhaustion it’s easy to hear those lies, to have a melt down, and to feel not enough. God placed us with the kids we have for a reason. They need us and we need them! Don’t subject yourself to judgement or mom guilt like I did today. You are awesome! 

xoxo kymberly 

Name in wood letters. 

We used this photo to announce our daughters name 

  
I am absolutely obsessed with how they came out and can’t wait for next month when I get to hang them in her room!! 

Also this is a nursery teaser! Can’t wait to put everything all together in a couple months!!! 

My super talented friend put this all together on wood letters! If you want her to make your son or daughters name let me know and I can get you her information!!! 

xoxo kymberly 

 

Baby Girl Name Reveal. 

For those of you who do not know me, I grew up on some sort of sports field. If I wasn’t the one at practice or playing, it was one of my brothers. If it wasn’t one of us kids, we were watching my parents in their softball league. It was just life for me. 

I stopped playing soccer after my Jr. Year in high school. I don’t regret that, but I do wish I tried out for my college team. But oh well and I am getting off topic… 

I married a huge sports fan! Caleb knows so much about so many things. He played sports growing up, but his knowledge of sports and players and stats is what sets him apart from other sports fans. And he doesn’t just love or know about one sport, it’s all sports. 

When we found out I was pregnant we started going over girl names right away. I really wanted Quinn or Kyndal and Caleb wanted Madison after Madison Bumgarner. We didn’t even know we were having a girl, but for 15 weeks I called the baby Quinn and he called it Madison.  

We found out we were actually having a girl and that meant we had to get serious. 

I was feeling discouraged because we both wanted a name so bad. I thought we would never choose. 

Then Caleb picked another sports player name and my heart just knew that was it. 

  
I had Madison Bumgarner or Peyton Manning. 

I chose Peyton. 

I also knew instantly her middle name. This word has meant so much to me in this particular pregnancy for so many reasons. I also want her to have faith in her life always. 

I was sitting at dinner one night and just had this feeling that I should drop my name list, no matter how much I wanted them, and let Caleb choose her name. 

A father/daughter relationship is so special. I want them to have the best relationship possible and I thought it was a special first moment for Caleb to choose her name. This name is after an incredible quarterback, who plays a sport that my husband LOVES. I didn’t know that it would be so rewarding to give up my baby name dreams and allow my daughter to be named after an athlete. 

Peyton Faith is due July 24, 2016. She is measuring two weeks ahead, so I’m praying that means she comes early haha. Cross your fingers for me! 

And a random fact, we decided on the Peyton a couple hours before Peyton Manning announced his retirement! 

xoxo kymberly