The word over my 2017 is Hope.
Hope for all that I have had faith in.
Learn and really dive into what Hope means and is.
Excited for this year. Excited to see where Hope takes me.
Bring it on 2017!
Happy New Year!
What a crazy year 2016 was for my family and I.
I had a pretty painful pregnancy, an even more painful labor and delivery, that led to the most perfect baby girl!
We bought our first home and moved when Peyton was 3 weeks old.
I have had some weird symptoms happen that doctors cant figure out a diagnosis. It started after Peyton was born, so I think it has something to do with my crazy labor.
Peyton has had some weird stuff also, but she’s perfect and every test, ultrasound or X-ray taken, has come back to show she’s perfect!!
Nathan is such a good little boy. He is also 2, so I’m learning what “terrible twos” are all about. He is whitty and has brought so many smiles to my face and heart.
Caleb still is loving his job and has been working more and more on his Mustang to make it faster so he can race his dad one day.
So that’s a really short summary of my year.
2017 I’m putting the word Hope over the year. 2016 I felt the word Faith. To have faith in everything coming our way. This year I’m having Hope after all that Faith. Really learn what it is to have Hope and what that looks like in every day life.
Happy New Year!
Struggle Bus. 🚌
Two year olds are not a joke. Especially the ones that have an insane vocabulary and are whitty… like the one I have. Who can talk circles around you and tell you all the reasons he doesn’t want to and can’t pick up his toys. It makes your mind jello to where all you do is point to his room because all that talking he just did made you dizzy (Pointing to his room most of the time gets him to do what I originally said before he started talking 500 words a minute).
Two year olds are also hilarious. I get a good laugh from the whitty thIngs Nathan comes up with.
But the struggle bus comes when I am completely caught off guard and don’t know what to do or how to discipline him. Some days I wish he came with an instruction manual so I knew how to best discipline him in the most effective way so he learns correctly.
I also spend most of my day repeating the same three things over and over.
“Don’t unplug that”
“Don’t plug that in”
“Don’t climb on that”
You would think after a year of the same three commands something would stick?! At least maybe one of them!!!
Let’s just talk about those… not awesome! I also don’t love all the parents who I ask about meltdowns and they are like, “my toddler doesn’t have them, does yours have a lot of meltdowns, like, behavioral problems?” Really??? No he doesn’t have behavior problems, he’s 2 and gets mad when it’s time for bed or he can’t have a cookie. Then it’s on the floor crying and screaming for a hot minute. But I seriously cannot be the only one who has a toddler with meltdowns right?
So I’m struggling mainly with finding the best effective way to discipline my toddler. He is an incredible and smart little one. I am very thankful to say he is good in stores and in car rides. He is amazing with his baby sister! He just does not want to listen to some of the rules in the house, like plugging in the lamp to an outlet or climbing on his dresser to open his window 😳🙄.
That’s my struggle bus rant at the moment. I truly just want to be the best Mom for my kids. I want to raise them correctly and teach them how to listen to direction and be respectful. That there is a time to play and be crazy and a time to listen and follow the rules.
Saying that, he is only 2. Sometimes I think he’s way older than he is because of his vocabulary and attitude.
And although he’s keeping me on my toes, and probably giving me grey hair…. I wouldn’t change a thing about him.
Picture taken off Pinterest
So to start this off I want to say that I am NOT an organic mommy or person. But over the last year I have slowly came to love the Honest Company.
Although I’m not an organic person, I really love the idea of having a son and daughter with such sensitive skin have an option of using pure products. I still try a small amount of everything on them to see if they have a reaction, and so far not one reaction to this brand. I feel good knowing there are so many different products that I can choose from in this brand and there won’t be a rash breakout.
Do you guys use The Honest Company?
I honestly feel that their diapers are over priced to just throw away. I bought a box on clearence once to try them out. They worked real well but I wasn’t more impressed with them than I was Pampers. Although the Honest diapers are pretty cute!
The wipes are nice! I like them a lot. In all honesty I feel the same as I do with the diapers. They go in the trash so fast and I don’t find them more impressive than pampers sensitive wipes or huggies wipes.
I’ve gone threw a full bottle of shampoo and body wash on Nathan already and really liked it! So I got a two pack combo at Costco. I don’t know how it does with long hair, but they do sell conditioner! I also like that it can make a bubble bath!
The diaper rash cream I bought because I started reading some negative things about Desitin and there wasn’t a huge price difference between the two. It works really well! It settles in its packaging, so I have to shake it up so when I go to use it cream comes out and not just oil. Unfortantly Peyton gets really bad diaper rashes and this doesn’t clear them up. So I do have to use Desitin for the first couple diapers to help her rash and then I can use this after to finish the healing of her poor little bottom.
The healing balm is amazing! I actually cut my big Prego belly with the end of the diaper rash cream really bad. I put some of the healing cream on it and it fused the cut together with out scabbing! I’ve used it on Nathan a lot with all the scrapes he gets! I also love this because I was told to not use Neosporen on a child under two. So this is the perfect cream for a busy young toddler!
The hand sanitizer spray I’m really excited about. I just recently added this to my collection of the brand, and Nathan loves it way more than me using baby wipes to wipe his hands all the time! It dries really quickly.
The face and body lotion I like because of the face part. I feel like sometimes Nathan’s face can feel dry and I don’t want to put body lotion on his face! So I love having this option to go to! And the lavender smell on babies is amazing! I do admit that I like the lavender Johnson&Johnson smell the best, but unfortantly Peyton broke out in a rash when I put it on her. The Honest Co. doesn’t give her a rash.
The baby oil is amazing. I love the pump dispenser and how easy it is to use. I don’t like when oils are messy and this bottle makes it very easy and clean to use/apply. It is expensive for baby oil. Compared to Johnson&Johnson, it is expensive. Peyton broke out in a small rash when I used Johnson&Johnson baby oil on her. I use baby oil for her cradle cap. Works really well!
What are your thoughts and favorite brands?!
Half a decade of marriage. I could just say I’ve been married for five years, but half a decade sounds way cooler!
Today marks five years since Caleb and I stood in front of all our closest friends and family and vowed to one another to choose each other every day. That day was perfect. And yes, we were that awesome couple that got married on 11-11-11! I should really write about that day and what I remember because it was everything I dreamed it would be. But since that day, life has not been perfect but it’s been rewarding.
Marriage is hard. Hard work! Every person is unique, then stick them in a marriage and you learn a lot. So I thought I would go over some of what I have learned the last half a decade of being married.
1. I’m not awesome. That is probably the biggest thing I’ve learned the last five years. I have issues and I am not perfect. I’m hard to live with, I’m a perfectionist and a clean freak and annoying. I’m loved and accepted, but man some times I sit back and think, “I’m really annoying, poor Caleb!” Haha! I can really joke about this, but on a more serious note, marriage is always work. There is always a topic to work on or talk about, and in these times I have learned that I can only grow as a woman and wife.
2. Love and respect. It’s real. Ever read the book love and respect? It’s basically saying that if you respect your husband first he will return that respect and show love in the way you receive love. Ever read 5 love languages? That’s real too! So I have learned that I need to respect Caleb even when he drives me bonkers, and love him the way he feels love, which is quality time and physical touch. My natural way to show love is words of encouragement, but that’s not how Caleb feels loved the most. So I can always work on that.
3. Don’t talk negatively about the others family. This is one my marriage doesn’t really struggle with, but in-laws can annoy you. Parent in-laws, brother-in-laws, sister-in-laws… just don’t speak negatively about them. That will only cause problems.
4. Babies are distracting. I love my kids more than anything on this earth! Man they are amazing! I have a newborn and toddler. Obviously my days are crazy. When Caleb gets home, my newborn needs a diaper change and my toddler won’t stop talking about whatever he is talking about at that moment. I love it. And as much as I love it, it also takes away from having that quality time with my husband. Our babies are dependent on us right now, so their needs are urgent and important because we are the only ones that can help them out. They distract us from telling each other about our days or dreams or thoughts. Love them, they are our greatest gifts, we have to work harder at prioritizing time together because of them.
5. People can’t read minds. Therefore, my husband can’t read my mind and I can’t read his mind. We aren’t super heros (although sometimes I feel like I am a super hero being a mom…) so it is really important to communicate what is on our mind. If I don’t tell Caleb he hurt my feelings, he won’t know, could do it again, and it could blow up later because he didn’t know he was doing something that was hurting me. So… communicate.
We have graduated college, gone threw 5 jobs combined, are currently in our 6th home, we have 2 kids, and so many more adventures to go on. It’s been a busy five years!
Overall, in all seriousness I find marriage hard work but so rewarding. I think it’s because I constantly find that I have to work on myself and how to love, and I don’t think anyone likes to admit they aren’t awesome and need to work on things. But then we work on those things and become stronger and better.
In those learning areas, Caleb and I are a great team. I’m really proud at how we work together and communicate about finances, budgets, and goals. We have a lot of strengths as a couple. Caleb knows me better than anyone else. He still chooses me every day. Does little things, like notes or buying me coffee before he heads to work when we pull an all nighter with our vomiting 2 year old. (Other learning points- still date each other and still do the little things! They matter).
Cheers to the next five years! Can’t wait to see where we are then! Maybe Texas! (I really want to move to Texas!)
Happy Anniversary Caleb! Thank you for choosing me, thank you for getting down on one knee with my Tiffany’s ring, letting me plan the wedding of my dreams, and vowing your love to me in front of so many friends and family. I love you. 💗 I don’t know what my life would be like without you, and I truly am grateful for you. Muah!
Disclaimer…. I have a newborn and don’t get much sleep… so if there is a lot of grammar errors, just have grace on me because I’m not proof reading this I’m just going to go to bed!
What have you learned being married?
My husband got a smart tv for his birthday. It was really a gift to both of us because I can throw YouTube, Hulu, Netflix and Pandora on the TV. Most nights we are listening to Sunday school songs on YouTube. But tonight that was not going to work for my mad tired newborn and loud toddler that wouldn’t let the newborn sleep.
So for the first time I threw Pandora on the tv. I listen to the station, Jesus Culture Radio on Pandora. It’s perfect for my flustered heart on days like this.
Days where there is loads of unfolded laundry taking over my couch. Days when I forgot to pull out meat from the freezer. Days when dinner ends up being mac and cheese. Days when I my house is a MESS and the kitchen is disgusting. Days where I feel overwhelmed by all the work that needs to be done. And when my house is super messy I feel overwhelmed because I don’t love to live in a mess.
But as the pot was boiling the mac and cheese, I just started singing along to Pandora. Then Nathan started singing. I love his little voice. Then we ended up dancing and worshiping in the kitchen and the noodles cooked to long haha.
It was a great memory for me. His laughter and singing from the heart. His clapping and jumping. His joy! It all put Peyton to sleep!
I want my kids to remember dancing in the kitchen instead of me cleaning the kitchen. They won’t remember the dishes. They won’t remember the clean unfolded laundry. They won’t remember the graham cracker crumbs under the table… or maybe they will haha…
But I want them to remember the dancing. The joy. The laughing. The times I was able to put aside all that work, to be present with them. To make memories with them.
The days can be so long but the years are so short!
Right now I have both my kids napping. The youngest is slowly waking up, or I would go take a nap also. Today I felt like I needed to use my spare five minutes to write.
Today I broke. I got to the breaking point from the hectic last few weeks and broke. I just cried as I made Nathan’s lunch.
I’m so tired.
And in the exhaustion I can’t think clearly.
Peyton is 6 weeks old and from the moment she was born she has had something going on with her. Nothing serious, but enough to have prescriptions or X-rays taken. Every week it’s something new and normally the things overlap to where I’m not getting a break to see her fully healthy. I have told some friends that I’m ready for her to be about 6 months old. Out of the newborn age so there is more options on ways to help her out.
Nathan is 2. He doesn’t like to listen. It drives me insane and to keep from losing my cool, I have to remind myself that he is only two, he just had a new sister, mommy isn’t focused only on him, and we just moved to a new house. He has a lot going on in his little life!
But today I took about an hour getting Peyton to sleep. I put her down and Nathan ran and slammed the door shut. I was so mad. So mad. It woke her up. I told him for the first time to go to his room. I needed a break. He cried for maybe 4 minutes until he found his 5,687 toys and played. I put Peyton back to sleep and made his lunch. Then tears just fell and I cried a couple minutes to a friend.
What is this rash Peyton has now? How can I help her? Is it serious? Should I take her to the doctor? Is she okay? Am I crazy? Because I’m so tired, I can’t think clearly. I am mentally and physically exhausted. I find myself praying all day that Peyton is completely healed, for peace in my heart and wisdom. No more contacting her doctor or asking my mom friends the same questions over and over from their experiences.
I just need to come up for some air. I have been living under a rock trying to figure this all out. Our new home, a wife, mom of two, a sister, and still being a friend to others.
I’ve had a lot of people ask to help me, and I have taken help from a good amount of amazing women in my life. So thankful for them. But even after they leave or I get off the phone with them, I’m exhausted.
I learned my worst fear isn’t necessarily bad health, it’s my kids having something wrong and I don’t have the wisdom to know what to do and it becomes worse.
Crying today helped me. Sitting in silence right now is also helpful. Writing is therapeutic for me. I felt like I came up for air a little today. I actually threw up my hands and said I can’t carry all this. Such a crazy season right now and I am praying I have the right perspective to enjoy the moment because I know this time will go fast. I think I just need to come up for air a little more often and rest in the peace of Christ.